There was once a fellow who was running around town gasping for breath, his eyes bulging out. This went on for a while until he finally decided that he needed to see a doctor. He went to a doctor, who examined him thoroughly. When the doctor finished his examination, he looked at his patient sadly and said, “I really don’t know what’s wrong with you, but I can tell you that if things continue the way they’ve been going, you have only two or three months to live.”
The man leaves his doctor’s office and heads home to do some serious thinking. He decides that if his life is going to be this shortened, he has a whole lot of living to do in the time left. He started spending money like a madman, traveling all over the place trying to squeeze everything he could out of his last weeks on earth.
One day, he entered a clothing shop and told the clerk, “I need fourteen shirts and I need them all with a 14 1/2 inch neck and a 32 inch sleeve.” The clerk looked the man over and said, “I think it would be a good idea if we took some measurements.” The clerk pulls out a measuring tape and measures the man’s sleeve length saying, “Yep, 32 inches looks just right.” The clerk then measures the fellow’s neck, steps back shaking his head and says, “Mister, if you try to put your 16 1/2 inch neck into a 14 1/2 inch collar, you’re going to be running around town, gasping for breath with your eyes bulging out.”
This joke was told Sunday morning by Rev. Jimmie Smith… the focus was on health.
Health is a large word. It embraces not the body only, but the mind and spirit as well;… and not today’s pain or pleasure alone, but the whole being and outlook of a man. ~James H. West